Finding A Costume
by Harry's Girl 01031992
Summary: I know it's a little late for Halloween fics, but in this one, Pintel and Ragetti are invited to Captain Jack Sparrow's Halloween party, but there's just one problem...they need to find a decent costume. Rated T for PintelRagetti slash and mild language


_This was originally in a contest on (in which I won 3rd place) during the Halloween season. If you're wondering why I'm uploading it on Valentine's Day, it's because if I don't submit it now, I'll most likely forget about it. And for some reason, I made Pintel and Ragetti live in the present day. Oh, yeah, I'm typing with a Pintel/Ragetti vernacular, so if you have any trouble understanding it, please note me. Anyway...**ONWARD WITH THE STORY!!!

* * *

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"Oy, Pinters!!!" Ragetti cried out, holding an envelope in his hand and waving it in the air like a flag. "We got somefing in the mail!"

"Well, open the bloody envelope." Pintel replied.

Ragetti did as he was told and ripped the envelope open. He pulled out a card that was orange and black covered with decorations of jack 'o lanterns, ghosts, and other things like that.

Pintel grabbed the card and read out loud, "'You're invited to Captain Jack Sparrow's Halloween Costume Party! Come one and all to the scariest costume party of the Halloween season! Wear whatever costume you feel like wearing, be it scary, pretty, funny, or just plain bizarre! The date of the party is October 31st and it's being held on Captain Jack's ship, _The Black Pearl_. Make sure you RSVP by the 15th of October by calling 867-5309! Hope to see you there!'"

"Can we please go?" Ragetti begged. "Please, please, please, with sugar on top and whipped cream and cherries and hot fudge on top? Please?"

"No," Pintel replied. "I ain't goin' to a bloody costume party."

After hearing this, Ragetti's eye filled up with tears and he pouted.

"Ah, come on," Pintel sighed. "Don't give me that look."

Ragetti broke out into hysterical sobs.

"On our first date, Oi thought you said that you would take me anywhere. But Oi guess you were wrong…Apparently you don't love me anymore!" His sobs then turned into hysteric blubbering.

Pintel, feeling guilty, pulled out his Casio KeyTar (A/N: I don't know if that's the right word for it, but I'll just go with my gut feeling and say that it is.) and started playing.

He sang.

_You are my sunshine,_

_My only sunshine_

_You make me happy_

_When skies are grey _

_You'll never know, dear,_

_How much I love you_

_Please don't take my sunshine away_

"Awww," Ragetti sighed, wiping a tear from his eye. "You know Oi can't resist that song! So does this mean we're going to the party?"

Pintel sighed heavily. "Yes, we can go!"

Ragetti let out a cry of joy.

"Thank you, Pinters!" Ragetti exclaimed, hugging Pintel, and his eye bright with excitement. "You won't regret this!"

Later that day, they called Captain Jack to RSVP. Jack was glad to hear that his favorite crew members were coming to the party.

* * *

A couple of hours later, Ragetti sat in the middle of the living room floor with an undecided look on his face, pencil in hand, writing on several pieces of paper. Pintel walked in and wondered what Ragetti could've been up to.

"Wot the bloody 'eck are you doing?" Pintel inquired.

"Oi'm making a list of possible costumes we could wear to the party!" Ragetti replied, with a large grin.

Pintel sighed. "Okay…name 'em off."

"Popeye an' Olive Oyl?"

"No."

"Dorothy an' the Scarecrow?"

"No."

"Scarlett O'Hara an' Rhett Butler?"

"Oh, God, no."

"Elphaba and Galinda?"

"'Oo the 'ell are they?!"

"They're from the Broadway musical, _Wicked_."

"If they're from a Broadway musical, I ain't doin' it."

"My final idea is Beauty and the Beast." Ragetti said.

"Fine," Pintel replied. "I'll go with that one, just as long as I don't have to be the wench."

"Whoo-hoo!" Ragetti exclaimed. "An' don't call 'er a wench, 'cos you'd be calling me that, and tha's jus' wrong."

* * *

A week passed and the mad rush for costumes was at every store that had a Halloween section.

"Oi told you we should've gone to the store before everybody waited 'til the last minute!" Ragetti complained. "But nooooo, you just had to sit on your fat, lazy arse watching American football all week."

"Well, I told _you_ that it was Playoffs week!" Pintel replied. "I would've gone, but you kept on bugging me about it saying," He imitated Ragetti in a high pitched, girly voice. "'Oh, Pintel! We've got to get to the store before the mad rush!' 'Oh, Pintel! Get up off your butt for an hour an' let's go shoppin'!' Do you know 'ow annoying that gets?"

"Well, let's not argue about this now." Ragetti said firmly, cool and collected. "Let's go now, before the mad rush gets insane."

Pintel and Ragetti got to the nearest Goodwill store after two missed buses (the first time, Ragetti was distracted by an abnormally fat squirrel; the second, Pintel fell asleep on the bus bench after waiting 30 minutes for the next one).

When they got there, the store was packed. They could barely move one foot without someone invading their personal bubble or stepping on their feet.

"Ugh," Ragetti groaned. "This is 'opeless. We'll never get a costume in time for the party."

"You were right," Pintel admitted. "I should've gotten up off of my lazy arse." Just then, a voice came on the loudspeaker.

"Attention all shoppers!" the voice said. "We only have one couple's costume left in the Halloween section. If you want to be Beauty and the Beast this year for Halloween, I suggest you get over there right now!"

Ragetti and Pintel scampered to the Halloween section, but when they got there, there was a couple already over there.

Pintel and Ragetti locked this couple in a fierce stare-down between each other, their eyes darting back and forth from each other to the costume.

"So, are you gonna take action or not?" the lady in the couple asked, her voice filled with determination that seemed malicious.

"Yeah, you pair of homosexuals," the boyfriend said. "Are you just gonna stand there and let us take that costume?"

"So wot if we're a pair of flaming turkeys?" Pintel inquired.

"At least we're a pair of flaming turkey **pirates** who aren't afraid to kick some major butt and ain't afraid to fight." Ragetti added, pulling out his sword.

"Oh, now it's ON!" exclaimed the boyfriend.

Ragetti and the girlfriend dived for the costume as Pintel and the boyfriend started punching and kicking each other.

* * *

"Is that all you goh?" Pintel asked as he slugged the boyfriend in the eye.

"You'll be surprised at what I can do!" the boyfriend replied as he socked Pintel in the gut.

"You're good," Pintel remarked, choking back his pain. "But I'm even better!"

He pulled out his sword and sliced the boyfriend's arm after a missed punch towards Pintel's face.

"You sliced me!" the boyfriend exclaimed.

"No, shet, Sherlock! Thanks for pointing out th' obvious." Pintel replied.

* * *

Meanwhile, Ragetti and the girlfriend were fighting over the costume.

"Let go, you homo!" exclaimed the girlfriend.

"No! You le' i' go, you insensitive woman!" Ragetti replied. "Is i' me, or are you an' your boyfrien' against two men togetha, 'cos if you are, tha's jus' plain rude!"

"As a matter of fact," she replied coolly. "We are! Two men should never be together! It's not natural; it's just sick and wrong!"

"Well, maybe i's natch-rull to me best mate an' Oi!" Ragetti said snappishly. He then kicked the girlfriend in both shins and snatched it from her.

* * *

"Oy! Pinters!" Ragetti exclaimed. "Oi've got th' costume!"

"Great!" Pintel replied, while trying to hold off the boyfriend. "Now, let's get the 'ell outta 'ere!" He then kicked the boyfriend below the belt. He and Ragetti ran out of the store exclaiming, "Goodbye, poppets!"

* * *

A few days later, it was the night of the party. Pintel and Ragetti were preparing for a fun night out on _The Black Pearl_, when all of a sudden, the unthinkable happened: Ragetti lost his shoes.

"GAH!" Ragetti exclaimed. "Where're me shoes?"

"I don't know," Pintel replied, as he was in the bathroom putting on his Beast facial hair and make up. "'Ave you tried looking under th' sofa?"

"Yeah, Oi 'ave!" Ragetti gasped, his hair all out of place. "An' becos of not bein' able to foind me shoes, Oi look loik a wreck!" he sobbed.

"Rags," Pintel said, putting on the last of his make-up. "You don' look like a wreck." He wiped a tear from Ragetti's eye. "You look be-yoo-ih-ful."

"Really?" sniffled Ragetti. "You really mean it?"

"With all me 'eart." Pintel replied.

A smile appeared on Ragetti's face, spreading from ear to ear.

"Oi bet Oi can jus' wear me regular street shoes," Ragetti said. "Oi reckon the dress covers up me feet anyhow."

"Now let's go to that party." Pintel said. "It's jus' aroun' the block in th' harbor."

"Oi love you, Pinters," Ragetti said warmly, as he was putting on his shoes.

"I love you, too, Rags." Pintel replied.

They then kissed each other and went off to the party.

**The End**


End file.
